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This is my story once upon a time

When I was young and love was blind

I fell for every boy I saw

I fell straight into the monster's claw

Felt like it's the end of life

When rejected and kicked aside

Became a huge mess hard to clean

Own fault for being so mean

Nobody likes any boyish girls
But girly acts make me wanna hurl

Others say I need to clean up my act

I say I don't give a fuck bout that

Felt so fucked up bout being dissed

Felt so angry bout being pissed

So very frustrated that Im lonely

Afraid Im left with nobody...

Tribute to YOU

Sometimes I feel so hurt
Feeling so bad I couldnt cope
Not knowing who to turn to
Feeling so lost without hope

That's when i think of you
About all the things you give
All the love you provide
The moments You make me happy

Im so very ashamed of myself
To forget you when Im full of glow
Then only to remember you
Each time I am filled with sorrow

No matter how many times
I have turned my back on you
You never leave my side
Never fail when I need you

Though I often let you down
You never lift your foot and turn around
Whenever I fell hard on the ground
You pick me up and take away my frown
You bring along a funny clown
To cheer me up every time Im down
Your Love so many I have lost count
You really deserve to wear the Holy crown

Gah!!! Argh!!!

Gosh!!! These ppl are really pissing me off!!!
Why? Why?
The event is tomorrow. They told us about this event just a couple of hours ago...
We have quizzes and classes until 4pm tomorrow la sayang intan payung berlian oi...
How r we supposed to get 30 signatures, 40 gifts, practise a 10 minutes performance, and all those u guys asked us to do... Do u realize how many of us there is?
Sometimes, u guys really... Argh!!!

Eh, Tolongla paham!!!

KKR ST PETER A SUCCESS... ;p

Everything went wonderful... Just wonderful!!!
Praise The Lord!!!
Everybody had a wonderful time, even thought we're all worn out during the end of the day, we didnt regret what we had done on that night...
I really had a great time even thought at some certain point of time, I felt like giving up... But, I chose to ignore that feeling and it paid out in the end...
What a relief! Hahaha... Im loving it... Here's some of the pictures...

KKR Gawai Kaamatan 2009

Back On The Ground

Yea!!! Im back on my feet...
No longer quarantined... Hahaha...
Not even a week quarantined, we escaped from the house...
Shh... Its a secret... ;p
Well, now getting ready to handle many upcoming events...
Back to my busy life... Bz ker???

Please Protect us Dear God...

Well, guess what... been quarantined since monday midnight...
gotten suspected with H1N1 too...
However, its not confirmed yet as we havent had out blood checked yet...
We have to wait for the doctors to come...
Which is taking much too long...
I cant wait to get out of this house...
Please lah... I nid to go out n have fresh air...
But we are not allowed even to take a step out of this house... huhuhu...

Please God, take away our sickness... Amen...

Sick... Soo afraid...

Omg, so many of us are sick...
I think 2 of us hv been suspected H1N1...
Im so afraid...
Gonna go hv check up later...
Praying to GOD that HE ties all the evils disturbing us...

Amen...

Moments to Misery

A few more days from now, im heading back to hell... No, the place is not exactly HELL, but living there is like going through life in the bushes... U get what I mean? Im not use to that kind of life... But, what can I do, I got myself into that place... I though going there will make my family proud of me, well, they are actually... But, little that I know, my life seems like its almost coming to an end... Um, maybe I exaggerated a bit there... I dont know, feels like Im almost feeling alone and in trouble, you know, but I dont have anyone to confide to... Even if I do, i would be too proud to admit that im a Damsel In Distress... Many offered to accompany me during my time of need, but, I dont know, Im just, how do I say it, emmm, how ah? I dont feel like I can accept the offers... Why? Dont ask me why... I dont even know it myself... Huhu... I dont think I can go through it again for 3 more years... OMG, please bear with me Dear God... Please be by my side everywhere I go... Sometimes, I wish that I can always be in my family's care always... even when Im down, there will always going to be that extra reason to smile... When Im at that other place, I feel like giving up most of the times... U Know..

Riot Poem

Sometimes you feel down
When the dark cloud comes around
Making you feel blue
When others look down on you

Trying so hard to understand
What they want and their demands
Trying to make them realize
I’m not going to wear any disguise

I am what I am
I never want to change
What you see is what u get
And I will not regret
I don’t care if you’re not happy
That’s because you don’t know me
Just shut up, stop judging me
Leave me alone, just let me be

Don’t try to act like a boss
Never treat me as a clown
I have my own pride
I am going to wear that crown

I stand for my belief
I fight for my right
Not going to give up easily
So you better go take a hike

I am what I am
I never want to change
What you see is what u get
And I will not regret
I don’t care if you’re not happy
That’s because you don’t know me
Just shut up, stop judging me
Leave me alone, just let me be

Have You Ever Wonder

Have you ever wonder
How friends turn to foes
When at an unsuspecting time
Everything turns out blur

Have you ever wonder
How some plans backfire
When you’ve put in efforts
Hoping the result gets better

It is really strange
To see people change
Without a prior notice
Becomes a sudden egoist
It seems like people
Are starting a trend
To start out friendly
Then ends up as a fiend

Have you ever wonder
How much a small word hurts
Stabs you like a dagger
In your little fragile heart

Have you ever wonder
How fast time flies
When you’re enjoying yourself
Treating yourself to white lies

It is really strange
To see people change
Without a prior notice
Becomes a sudden egoist
It seems like people
Are starting a trend
To start out friendly
Then ends up as a fiend

Tell Me...

Tell me what should I do
When the past comes back haunting
Out of nowhere, suddenly out of the blue
Sad memories come charging

Sorrow comes back flooding in
Hurting the fragile little heart
Tell me how to overcome this feeling
The feeling that's tearing me apart

Tell me how should I live with this
This memory that brings pain and agony
A memory I've been trying to get rid of
A memory so hurtful it hurt me deeply

A memory caused by shameful confession
Of a heart so innocent and sincere
But then rejected and pushed aside
Thus creating a feeling i hate and fear

Tell me how to entirely shut it off
Where should I throw it away to
Tell me how to get rid of this horrible memory
Just tell me what should I do

All I want is to care about you
All I want is to stay friend with you
All I want is to be near you
But I should forget everything about you...

Some Story

It makes me wonder
How u walk around town
Proudly and bitchy-ly
But still wearing the crown

How do u afford all those
Being admired and rejoiced
By them all around u
And still being so poised

I used to spend my times thinking
How I could possibly keep it in
Keep my angst to myself
A feeling of disgust and envy

Our personality's far different
Your not like me, and Im not like you
But somehow I often wonder
How did I obtain a friend like you

Sometimes u piss me off
Sometimes u give me migrains
Sometimes I feel like murdering u
But sometimes, Im glad we're friends

For A Special Friend

Have you ever wonder
Why the sky is so blue
Why the grass is so green
Why am I friends with you

Have you ever wonder
Why the sea is so wide
Why the fish dont fly
Why I call you at night

Have you ever wonder
Why the birds fly up high
Why the cats chasing mice
Why I am sad when you cry

If ur still wondering why,
Just stare at the fish in the sea
Stare clearly into the sky,
And ull understand y u mean so much to me

Ur smile chase away my frown
Ur voice cools my anger down
Ur eyes makes my problems turn around
Ur always picking me up when Im down